Tuesday, November 12, 2013

5 Things I am NOT Thankful For

There's much to be said for maintaining a positive outlook and counting your blessings. 

This is not one of those posts.
To be honest those facebook updates of "I'll post something I'm thankful for every single day during November!" drive me nuts.  "Today I'm thankful for my lovebug, husband, lover, best friend, kissy kissy kissy face xoxoxo. He is truly my rock. My everything. My heart. My soul."
GAG.

And this crap goes on for the. entire. month. Day after day of old friends and new buddies posting this gooey mush about their husband and kids. 

Then you get the days where they are really reaching to come up with something so it's a "Day 25. I'm thankful for shoelaces!" 
Wow. Deep stuff there. /sarcasm

This post is for you, fellow cynics of the world, struggling to get through this month of Thankfulness without throttling someone.

5 Things I am Not Thankful For

5. Kids handing me bugs.  I have awesome boys. But no, it is not "the thought that counts." I do not want to hold your bug/worm/spider/cicada/ant. It isn't a gift I want. Do not hand it to me.  No thank you.

4. Public Bathroom Toilet Paper.  Better than nothing, I guess?  But it should not take me half a roll to get enough for one use.  Side note: In college I found an out of the way one-seater bathroom that had CHARMIN toilet paper.  I always went to that one. Didn't tell a soul about it (I'm no fool).

3. Junk in my water.  True story: Went to eat dinner at Cracker Barrel, ordered a water.  Waitress brings water and there's something floating around in it.  No thank you. Not thankful for debris in my water.

2. Zits.  Weren't we supposed to have outgrown this by now?  NOT THANKFUL.

1. People deleting my dvr recordings.  Unnamed persons in this household have been caught hitting 'stop' when something comes on that I was going to record.  This leaves me with the first 26 minutes of a 2 hour movie.  Cut that out.  Not thankful.


What are you NOT thankful for today?  Leave your answers in the comments. This can be our own little safe haven away from the insanity that is facebook in November!

6 comments:

  1. Thanks for sharing reality with us! There are so many things that I am thankful for, but now and then one does need a release. I agree with you on all of the above. Today I'm not appreciating the bad mood I'm in for no reason, so everything is bugging me! I'm not thankful for stepping on toys and siding across the floor, having dishes left over for me to do in the morning, waiting for 4 months of back and leg pain for my insoles to arrive (definitely not thankful that flat feet have caused problems ever since the week my daughter arrived). But for every whinge I have I *try* to remember something positive-but today it's more difficult. Thanks for listening, I'm feeling better already!

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  2. What a refreshing post!!!
    I'm not thankful for cold, gray, damp, windy, miserable wintery days.

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  3. Hahahahahaha! That was hilarious. I am not thankful for 17 degree weather. Well, I guess I could say I'm thankful it wasn't NEGATIVE 17. There is that.

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  4. I love this! Today, I am not thankful for POS cars. I have 2 of them. What works on one, doesn't work on the other! Drives me mad!

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  5. I am "One of those People doing the 30 day post" I'm not thankful for cold weather, ice, bills, losing people and having my blog blow up on me for no apparent reason.

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  6. HA! I love it. I'm not thankful for the stench that this huge factory belches out in the city I live in. I quite like my lungs, thank you, and would appreciate it if they could breath without me wanting to puke.

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